Sunday, February 10, 2008

Step 11

Page 87 out of the Big Book has a paragraph that reads:

As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day "Thy will be done." We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.

It works - it really does.

We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined.

Not my will, God's will. To let God be the director, no me. To give up being my own higher power, my ideas don't work well.

I've shared this paragraph out of step 11 from the 12 and 12 during another entry but I want to share it again. I read this paragraph out loud at a "12 and 12" study tonight and I was struck again about how much trust and surrender is needed to give up my will and trust God's.

We also fall into another similar temptation. We form ideas as to what we think God's will is for other people. We say to ourselves, "This one ought to be cured of his fatal malady," or "that one out to be relieved of his emotional pain," and we pray for these specific things. Such prayers, of course, are fundamentally good acts, but often they are based upon a supposition that we know God's will for the person for whom we pray. This means that side by side with an earnest prayer there can be a certain amount of presumption and conceit in us. It is A.A.'s experience that particularly in these cases we ought to pray that God's will, whatever it is, be done for others as well as for ourselves.

Just a good reminder to me that I really have no idea what is supposed to happen next in anyones life. My role? To trust in my Higher Power. To share my experience, strength and hope with other alcoholics. To love and support those close to me, without judging them or controlling them. To just be a people. plain and simple.

Thanks for letting me share.


Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for sharing that passage. It is what I really needed to hear tonight. I need to read that every day. I think praying for others to see God's will for themselves is a good way of getting us out of ourselves. Just letting God know that we are thinking of someone other than ourselves. Of course He knows that already.
I'll never forget last summer we were on a camping trip and heading towards home. It had been a great vacation, but this particular day everything that could go wrong did. Hideous traffic through Maryland and D.C., Smoking brakes through the Appalachin Mountains, exhaust getting noisier and noisier,dog pacing around and whining in the motor home, oh yeah and a flat tire. Throw into this mix that I had not been to a meeting in 10 days. We finally found a campground out in the middle of no where. It looked a place that the locals came to fish and camp and drink beer on the weekends. As soon as we got there the dog bolted and headed straight for the road, that is until she saw the neigbors miniture chiwuawua(however you spell it, anyway)Just as we were getting settled in and my husband did some repairs, the most hideous thunder,lightning and rain storm I have been in hit. There were tornado and flood alerts. did i mention that we camped right next to the river. My husband is usually the one to have a total meltdown in these types of situations,but this day-Thank God-He was really keeping a cool head. I on the other hand was ready to brave the storm and go find some beer. OK long story even longer, I am laying there praying and gritting my teeth and getting no relief what so ever. But, for some reason, my sponsors husband popped into my head. I suddenly remebered that he was having surgery in the morning. I started to pray for him, I prayed for the doctors I prayed for the nurses. The next thing I knew it was morning and the sun was shining. Best of all I was still sober.PS My husband told me he would have never let me get that beer, but he could never stop me before. Focusing on someone elses problem, took my mind off of me and got me through the night. Sorry this was so long again, but that passage made me think of that night and I thought you might like the story. Thanks for letting me blab!

indistinct said...

Thank you for taking the time to share this story. It's a gift when something as simple as praying for someone else in trouble can take us out of our troubles. So many times I remind myself that it's not about me, but about the person in front of me. Listening and sharing time. Sharing experience and hope. Thank you again for the reminder.

A question. Did the miniature chiwuawua get eaten? (grin)