Tuesday, September 2, 2008

God's house


My partner and I rented some Kayak's yesterday. We wanted to get away from the house, have some space just to ourselves, and choose the water. It was a sunny afternoon and we choose to rent at a spot with lots of little islands to poke around. Just floating, the warm sun upon us, the sandstone sculptured by wind and waves. We would warn each other when our thoughts had turned to issues at home, returning to focus on right here, right now.

As we edged along one island that had a sheer drop off into deep water, we found ourselves a float on hundreds and hundreds of jelly fish. Translucent, frosted, white. Two to five inches in diameter. Pulsing as they moved. We just stopped, transfixed. An ethereal beautify in a silent symphony.

We have lots of God moments on the water. When the handy work of the Creator is fully evident. The earth becomes a cathedral of joy, love, wonderment. Moments of pure serenity. Connectedness.

I lay in bed last night, still marvelling. Wondrous of my partner. How her faith supports her. She chooses to live in this home with an alcoholic husband and an addicted child. How much pain she has endured through the past few years. I don't think I'll every really understand it. She was curled against me as we were falling asleep. A special moment.

As I type, the sun just peeked over Salt Spring Island. A big orange ball, layers of cloud in front of it. Wisps of fog in the valleys of the island. The clouds above traced in light. Beauty again.

In all our stuggles, there is all this beauty. In so many different forms. I can see so much, now that I'm not chasing my feelings away. We get so much when we sober up. We get life.

A paragraph from page 75 of the big book:

We pocket our pride and to to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator. We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience. The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly. We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.


Photo Credit: Spitzgogo Chen

5 comments:

AlkySeltzer said...

What a beautifully conceived, and well-written posting! I almost cried--don't do that much any more-- when I read:

"We have lots of God moments on the water. When the handy work of the Creator is fully evident. The earth becomes a cathedral of joy, love, wonderment. Moments of pure serenity. Connectedness."

Oh my God, yesss. Thank you.
Steve E.

dAAve said...

Very nice.
I used to work offshore and have seen wondrous sites in the oceans.

Mary LA said...

My heart aches for what you are going through with your child. Such a moving post.

And I love to dream of the Braod Highway...
Hugs

Mary LA

Patty said...

That was very touching, I love that page from the Big Book also. Did any of us ever believe it was true the first time we read it? It is though. So true. Thanks for sharing, and reminding.

Sophie in the Moonlight said...

What a gorgeously visual post. My husband and I love kayaking for the same reasons. Those God moments are just about unavoidable when you are on the water, your feet removed from the gravity of terra firma.

Moving as usual, my dear.