Wednesday, December 30, 2009


It was a full day of visitors and visiting yesterday. Lots of times the feelings of wanting to escape came up. It was also the conclusion of our board game tournament and even though I lost, I still won, since all the losers had to treat the winner to lunch and it tasted good.

I feel a bit more level today. The buzzing in my head is much subdued. This morning, as I read my way through the blogosphere, I was filled with gratitude for what I was reading. Gratitude for starting my day with you.

My goal is to stay in the day, and learn to love that man in the mirror. I am meeting with a sponsee for coffee this afternoon. We still have family over for a few more days so more games and conversation.

I feel thankful that my life is in God's hands and that all that I am going through is just a part of the journey.

Tall Kay, over at Aha Moments, wrote about trust, faith, and fear. Spoke volumes to me.

Thank you for your support and comments.

Photo Credit: James Jordan


An Irish Friend of Bill said...

Eventually you will realize that you are actually alright, a loveable human being, ..and it will be utterly heartbreaking to see all the wasted years that you thought you ought to hate/diminish yourself for all your 'wrongs'.
If you think you feel sad now, just wait! ..this will wound you to your very centre. but in a good way. Each time we get a bit better, we grieve for the wasted days, months, decades, when we were 'blind and could not see' and thought it was acceptable to loathe ourselves and our weaknesses.
It ? might be a long time coming, but it will show up eventually..
The sooner you 'get' this, the less time you will squander. -As a fully lived life is impossible if you believe deep down that you deserve to be hated, even if only by yourself.

Findon said...

I enjoy reading your posts, honest and simply put. I always find that the best way. Have a good New Year and Take care